We are all addicted to screens, to a varying extent, but this constant craving for a device that no longer serves us begs further thought. All alone, separated from those we love, we’ve become misers holding onto a piece of plastic that gives us nothing but chaos and grief. Every time we pick up our phones, we are actively choosing to deprive others (and ourselves) from the very essence that is life sustaining… us. Clinging to something that is never in our dreams (think about that), that we can’t take with us when we die, is unconscionably destroying human relationships on an epic scale.
Governments worldwide are caving to the promises and allure of the technology industry and AI without any considerations or safeguards in place to manage the peril. The technology industry not only controls governments but has effectively invaded and now controls the human mind. Screen addiction is pervasive and has been carefully planned by those in power for the purpose of mass human control. Human thought has been harnessed and cultured, ripe for manipulation by nefarious and corrupt governments driven by the technology industry.
Oh dear… but there is a path out of this mess. Put down the phone NOW and do something nice for those around you. Dig deep to find your lonely and aching heart and let it guide you toward multiple and frequent Acts of Kindness. Your world will immediately change for the better. Do it now.
Science supports Acts of Kindness with prolific research showing positive benefits. Anna Lembke describes in her book Dopamine Nation an increase in the neurotransmitter dopamine when people pick up their phones, but dopamine is also released when people do Acts of Kindness, e.g., when they do something nice for themselves or others. Dopamine makes us feel good, alive, stimulated, and entertained. Humans like dopamine.
Anna Lembke describes how screen use over time causes a chronic depletion of dopamine resulting in depression. Alternatively, Acts of Kindness result in a homeostasis of brain chemicals. Reaching out to and helping others balances brain chemistry, refueling and rejuvenating the brain. A quick review of brain neurochemistry will help us understand and apply this concept of Acts of Kindness daily to significantly improve and enhance our lives.
The brain is bathed in chemicals. Some are neurotransmitters like dopamine, and some are hormones such as adrenaline. Whenever we engage with our phones or do a random Act of Kindness, dopamine and adrenaline are released, which give us that good feeling. What happens with excessive and prolonged screen use, as opposed to Acts of Kindness, is there’s too much dopamine in the brain, and the brain responds by downregulating the production of dopamine, resulting in what is termed a “dopamine depletion” state. Depression and anxiety are two results of dopamine depletion.
Fortunately, the brain has evolved to consistently strive toward homeostasis and does this by up-regulating or down-regulating the brain’s own endogenous chemical bath. If there’s too much of one neurotransmitter (dopamine) in the brain, the brain slows down production of that transmitter. If there’s too little, the brain upregulates production. Too much dopamine and adrenaline can increase risk of heart attack, stroke, and even cancer. So the brain acts to preserve and protect itself by slowing production of dopamine and adrenaline.
This down-regulation causes us to need higher frequency, longer duration, or increased potency or intensity of screen stimulus to achieve the same dopamine effects. This is the neurochemical process that drives screen addiction.
Along comes Acts of Kindness. Whenever you look lovingly into the eyes of your children, do an act of kindness, call a friend, or reach out to your family to repair relationships, the brain releases dopamine but does not reach a dopamine-deprived state as it does with screen overuse. What if we could get our hit of dopamine in a healthy way—one that wouldn’t harm our bodies or brains, but would improve relationships, moods, physical and mental health, and even cognition?
When people help each other, do chores for others, or simply reach out with a phone call to see if someone is okay, the brain produces dopamine just like screen use. The difference is there is no dopamine depletion with helping others.
Human beings thrive on engaging in purposeful activities. At the end of the day—and even in our dreams—we lie in bed reviewing what we did that day, looking for purpose or meaning in our actions and deeds. This is an inherent human trait and ultimately makes our lives worth living. When we engage in Acts of Kindness, we drift off to sleep with a smile on our face and warmth in our hearts, knowing we at least tried to improve our lives and the lives of others.
Reaching out of our screen-induced lethargy can be scary and immobilizing. We need to understand that our fears are irrational and fabricated. They have been carefully crafted by the algorithms embedded in our screens. The technology industry has consistently designed apps and AI to distance us from each other, making us feel rejected, ridiculed, or ostracized from those we love.
These fears are not real. They have been perpetrated and fueled by the technology industry, which has created a false sense of isolation, insecurity, and fear solely for the purpose of controlling us. Humanity has something screens will never replace: a heart and a soul. Uncovering and tapping into your heart will set you free from this device that has entrapped you into not believing in yourself, your kindness, and your enduring soul. Believe in something you take with you to your dreams, to your afterlife. Believe in your heart and soul.
For children, Acts of Kindness can be fostered by parents and teachers in many ways, but ultimately through assigning chores. Children who do chores have much higher success in adulthood than children who don’t. Chores make people feel good about themselves. Purposeful and meaningful activities not only give us a healthy hit of dopamine but also foster skill competence and confidence.
When my son was about 12 years old, as a pediatric occupational therapist, I was drawn to assigning chores to build future skill sets and adulthood success. Among his weekly chores, my son was assigned cooking dinner for the family on Friday nights. To make this more palatable, I told him he could invite as many friends as he wanted—he just had to give me the grocery list by Thursday night.
At first, I felt like a horrible mother to Matt and his friends, but quickly cooking dinner together became a momentous event for these young teens. They not only learned how to cook but also worked closely together to create fantastic meals. Soon the girls started coming, and teen dinners culminated in formal sit-down events with girls in dresses and boys in three-piece suits. Because we didn’t have cable and our VHS collection was small, the kids were focused on camaraderie and the task at hand. There were messes made and messes cleaned up, but the process was extraordinarily positive.
My hope for you, my dear friends, over the holidays is that every day is centered around a project or activity done together as a family. This could be as simple as baking cookies, playing a board or card game, or giving each child a night where they’re in charge of making a “team dinner.”
If you live alone, call an estranged friend or family member. No matter how scary that interaction feels, just close your eyes and do it. Know that reaching out guided by your heart and soul will result in something beautiful, momentous, and exhilarating.
Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result—choosing your phone over humanity—creates a chaotic hell of our own making. We can reverse this destructive path simply by choosing us over screens.
